Red Lipstick and Confidence: Owning Your Boldness Without Apology

Red lipstick. It has a way of sparking strong opinions, doesn’t it? It seems like no matter where you are or who you’re with, people always have something to say about it. But honestly, no one should be able to dictate whether or not you wear it, or if it "looks good on you." These personal beauty choices belong to you and you alone.

Recently, I was talking with someone close to me about an upcoming event, and I mentioned that my friend, who I was going with, always rocks a classic red lip. We’re both women who carry ourselves with confidence, and there’s something about wearing red lipstick together that amplifies the fun. It’s become our little tradition—bold lips, bold energy, and a carefree attitude that comes with embracing what makes us feel empowered.

I wasn’t expecting the conversation to shift the way it did, but it soon became clear that the person I was talking to had some thoughts on my choice of lip color.

My loved one immediately said, “I think you look younger when you wear pink lipstick.”

I replied, “Hmmm, okay. Well, I’m fine if I look older with red. Do you mean bright pink?”

“No,” she said. “It’s pale. It looks better with your skin and makes you look younger.”

I laughed and said, “I don’t care about looking younger.”

Then she came back with, “Okay, but I’m telling you that you look prettier when you wear the gloss instead of the red lipstick.”

I said thanks for the personal insight, but I’ll keep wearing my red lipstick. I changed the subject.

I’ve always danced to the beat of my own drum, but I’d be lying if I said those words didn’t occasionally get under my skin. Sometimes, I catch myself second-guessing, even if just for a moment. There have been times when those criticisms have stung deeply and left their mark, but despite that, I keep showing up as myself, staying true to who I am.

From the moment I started wearing a red lippy, I’ve had to defend my use of it. It’s shocking how opinionated people are about red. How dare I be loud and seen? Keep your mouth shut and obey—that was the messaging for centuries. I’m not angry at this loved one for making these comments, but I did text a bestie about the exchange. She quickly responded, reassuring me to keep rocking what I want to rock.

The History of Red Lipstick: A Color That Always Causes a Stir

Red lipstick has always been bold, and with that boldness comes controversy. From the time of Ancient Egypt, red lips were a symbol of power and seduction. Cleopatra is said to have crushed beetles to create her iconic red lip color. Throughout history, red lipstick has symbolized everything from rebellion to elegance, and its journey has been anything but quiet.

During the 16th century, Queen Elizabeth popularized red lipstick as a symbol of strength, often pairing it with her pale, powdered face. Fast forward to the 20th century, and red lipstick became a symbol of female independence, especially during the 1940s when it was worn by women stepping into the workforce during World War II.

But for every time red lipstick was celebrated, it also caused a stir. In the 19th century, it was considered scandalous and even associated with witchcraft. And still today, red lipstick can bring out strong opinions—whether it’s seen as too bold, too loud, or not “appropriate” for certain occasions.

The truth is, red lipstick has never been about blending in. It’s always been about standing out, making a statement, and embracing your power. So, while some might say it's "too much," its history proves that red lipstick has always been for those unafraid to be seen.