Many of us have spent years perfecting the art of appearing confident while secretly diminishing ourselves. We can be the ones people turn to, the ones who seem in control, the ones who navigate social spaces with ease. Yet deep inside, there’s a lingering doubt about whether we are truly lovable. Not just accepted, not just liked, but truly seen and loved for the wholeness of who we are.

Labels create comfort, but they also create walls. And those walls, over time, can trap us.

So often, we are unaware of the words spoken in our minds. The endless chatter, the ruminations, the self doubt that echoes past mistakes. The subconscious is the part of our mind that operates below conscious awareness, storing memories, emotions, fears, and learned behaviors that influence our thoughts and actions. It is a vast terrain, shaping our present reality even when we are not actively thinking about it. Diving into it can feel overwhelming, even intimidating, but just like any practice, the more we engage with it, the easier it becomes to navigate. And the reward? A mind that no longer clings to outdated narratives, but one that trusts itself fully.

This past weekend, I attended the Beyond Booze Fest hosted by Swift Fit Events. One of the most profound moments was during a panel discussion on sobriety. A speaker shared, "Before I was addicted to alcohol, I was addicted to acceptance." Wow. That statement struck a chord. How often do we find ourselves chasing acceptance, shaping ourselves to fit into boxes we were never meant to occupy? For many of us, the need for acceptance begins in childhood, and as we grow, it evolves into a relentless pursuit. Often leaving us disconnected from our authentic selves.

Communication is at the heart of how we relate to one another, but expressing concern about how we’re being treated is something many of us struggle with. For those of us who instinctively avoid conflict, the act of speaking up can feel almost unbearable. We hold things in, fearing that tension or disagreement will harm the relationship. Over time, though, I’ve come to realize that staying silent doesn’t protect relationships. It erodes them.

As women, many of us have spent years silencing ourselves. Whether through societal expectations, fear of judgment, or personal experiences. We’ve learned to hold back: our opinions, our truths, and even our voices. This silencing can manifest emotionally and physically, often showing up as shallow mouth breathing, tension in the throat, or even a fear of singing or speaking up.

I’ve been on a journey to heal this silencing within myself. Singing, something as natural as breathing, has long felt blocked for me. To heal this, I’ve turned to the power of breath. Specifically, I’ve been practicing the 9-9-9 breathing method: inhaling for 9 counts, holding for 9 counts, and exhaling for 9 counts. This simple yet profound technique has become a bridge to relaxation, vocal healing, and emotional release.

I often talk about the importance of inner work here, and there’s a reason for that. When you feel good on the inside, it radiates outward in ways that no botox, filter, makeup, or trendy outfit ever could. True self esteem, confidence, and contentment can’t be faked, they’re felt. When someone struggles with their sense of self, it’s often visible, especially in their eyes. No amount of external enhancements can hide the inner turmoil. That’s why doing the inner work is so transformative.

Manifestation is often misunderstood as simply wishing for something and waiting for it to happen. But at its core, manifestation is about aligning your thoughts, actions, and intentions with the life you want to create. It’s not magic. It’s a practice of clarity, commitment, and conscious action. Here’s how to manifest in a way that’s grounded, holistic, and transformative.

Life often tries to tame us, especially as women. Society imposes expectations and whispers rules about how we should live, love, and express ourselves. The Passion of the Wild Red Mother invites us to break free from those constraints. Not with bitterness, but with loving defiance. This is about reclaiming our right to live authentically, embracing the messy beauty of life with open arms.

Joyful defiance is not rebellion for rebellion’s sake; it’s a choice to live in alignment with our true selves, even when the world pressures us to conform. It’s about saying, “I refuse to dim my light, even when it makes others uncomfortable.”

Many of us are naturally giving and thoughtful people. We offer our time, our hearts, and our attention freely. We care deeply, even about those we’ve just met. We listen to others’ pain, hold space for their emotions, and try to be the person who isn’t judging but supporting. But when the roles are reversed, when we find ourselves in need of that same care and attention, sometimes we realize that those we’ve given so much to are nowhere to be found.

These are energy leeches. People who take and take without reciprocating. It’s one of the painful truths of being human. We pour ourselves into others, and instead of feeling a mutual exchange of love and care, we end up drained. It can feel like a vampire has sucked the energy right out of us, leaving us hollow and longing for an explanation. Why do they take without giving anything back? What makes them incapable of showing up for us the way we’ve shown up for them?

Change isn’t about perfection or meeting societal expectations. It’s about alignment. Living in a way that reflects your values and aspirations. Whether it’s stepping away from a toxic relationship, pursuing a new passion, or simply prioritizing rest and self care, the goal is to honor your truth.

2025 is not about becoming a “new you”. It’s about honoring who you already are and nurturing the potential within you. Intentions allow you to move forward without the weight of expectations, giving you the freedom to grow, evolve, and thrive. Let’s walk into this new year with grace, clarity, and purpose.

There’s a fascinating place where the lines blur. A space between the known and the unknown, the conscious and the subconscious, the physical and the spiritual. It’s not a place we can map or define in rigid terms, yet it’s one of the most profound areas of human experience. This liminal space is where transformation begins, where insights emerge, and where we connect with a reality beyond what we can see or touch.

Fear is a complex emotion, hiding beneath the surface of many feelings, behaviors, and even physical symptoms. It often disguises itself as anger, judgment, anxiety, or shame, making it difficult to confront directly. Yet, when we peel back the layers, fear reveals itself as a messenger, urging us to heal and grow.

The milestones we often celebrate in life are shifting, and that’s okay. It’s not about having the perfect job, home, or relationship. It’s about the quiet work of healing and growing that you do for yourself every day. Your younger self would be proud of the moments when you chose kindness over criticism, forgiveness over regret, and health over self neglect.

In the hustle and chaos of life, it can feel like everything around us is in constant motion. Emotions swirl, decisions pile up, and the pressure to act is always looming. But what if the greatest wisdom comes not from movement but from stillness? Ice, in its quiet and solid state, teaches us a profound lesson: clarity often requires a pause.

When you stop living for approval, you don’t just change your life, you inspire others to do the same. Your confidence in asserting boundaries, challenging harmful norms, and showing up as yourself sends a powerful message, especially to younger women.

Comparison has a sneaky way of weaving itself into our thoughts. It whispers that we’re not enough, that someone else’s success, beauty, or achievements diminish our own. But here’s the truth: freeing yourself from the mindset of comparison is one of the most valuable gifts you can give to yourself.

When you stop measuring yourself against others, you can begin to focus on your own unique path—one that’s completely tailored to who you are. Your glow, your talents, and your journey are yours alone, and no one else can replicate them. Breaking away from comparison isn’t just emotionally freeing; it has real, tangible benefits for your body, mind, and soul.

One of the most liberating aspects of viewing time as a web is how it softens our relationship with regret. In a linear understanding of time, the past is fixed and final. Mistakes and missed opportunities can feel like permanent failures. But in the web-like view, the past is still part of the present. It’s not frozen; it’s connected to who we are now and who we’re becoming.

For example, let’s say you regret a decision you made years ago. Instead of seeing it as a closed door, think of it as a thread that’s still part of your life’s tapestry. What lessons did you learn? How has that experience shaped your resilience or empathy? When we see the past as something we can reframe, it becomes a source of strength instead of a source of pain.

Pretty Skin Bitch is more than a blog—it’s a movement rooted in authenticity, connection, and empowerment. It’s about showing up for yourself and others, embracing a holistic approach to living, and rewriting the narratives that often hold us back.